Cloud 9

Orange isn't really my colour.  I own no orange clothes, or orange shoes.  No orange jewellry.  And up until last week I didn't own any orange nail polish either.

Sinful Colors Cloud 9 is a sweet mandarin with a gold shimmer.  It goes on quite sheer and I still had a visible nail line after three thick coats.  I didn't really like this for the week I wore it but now that I look at the photos I kind of love it.  Maybe I should give orange a chance!

This is one coat of OPI Matte Envy topped with three coats of Sinful Colors Cloud 9.  No top coat because I had a feeling I'd end up removing this mani pretty quickly.

Because I found the this mani so boldt and strange on me I only lasted two days before I topped it with something.  And I absolutely loved the result!

This is two coats of Nail It! with one coat of Revlon Quick Dry Topcoat to smooth everything out. Gorgeous.

DS Glow

OPI's DS collections are always a safe bet when you want a bit of bling but nothing that'll blind you forever if you happen to catch a glimpse of it out of the corner of your eye.

This is one coat of OPI Matte Nail Envy, three coats of OPI DS Glow, and two coats of Revlon Quick Dry Topcoat to smooth it all out.

Pretty.

A Butterfly Moment

Out of all the neutrals I've tried over the years, who'd have thought my absolute favourite would come from the Mariah Carey collection?  OPI's A Butterfly Moment is the perfect shade for my skin tone, with the perfect amount of shimmer to give it interest while still staying subtle.  A gorgeous, go-to polish.

This is one coat of OPI Matte Nail Envy, three coats of OPI A Butterfly Moment, and one coat of Sally Hansen Insta-Dry Anti-Chip Topcoat.

The Great Milky Foot Experiment of 2013 - The Stunning Conclusion!

By Day 1 - It's like nothing ever happened.  There is no change.  I am disappointed.

Day 2 - There's a slight shine to my soles, a faint feeling of dry tightness, and the area between my toes is flaking.  It's not a huge change but I'm hoping for big, gross things.  Fingers crossed!

Day 3 - And so it begins.  Day 3 dawns and the long promised peeling begins in earnest.  It's vile and cool in equal measures - vile because peeling skin obviously, but cool because the layer peeking from underneath the gross layer is lovely.  I'm seeing potential!  Must.  Not.  Peel.

Day 4 -  Dear god they never told me the TOPS of my feet would also peel off!  This is awful!  Huge sheets of skin just flapping in the breeze like the sails of a yacht.  I'm walking around town like a normal person and all the while I'm hyper aware of this leprous secret I'm hiding inside my shoes.

Day 5, and the grossness is almost impossible to quantify.  I am disgusted by my own feet.  Worse, though, is that it's no longer possible to ignore the flesh sloughing from my soles.  Yeah, it's ugly, but it's also itchy, tight, and uncomfortable.  I've resorted to doing the expressly forbidden - I'm manually peeling the worst of the hanging skin off.  I'll just have to hope I won't be scarred for life.

 

Day 6 - I've exfoliated and peeled the worst of the dead skin off.  The peeling process is not complete by any means, but there's a lot of fresh, pretty skin on the tops of my feet and the thinner skin of my soles like the arches and between the toes.  The heels and balls of my feet, having thicker skin, are taking a bit longer.

Day 7 - I resorted to the trusty Ped Egg to hurry the last of the skin off.  I'm so over this whole thing and I'm bored of having to shake dead skin out of my shoes.  But, and here's the thing you've been waiting for, my feet look AMAZING.  And, as advertised, they are as soft as balls.  Actually, I don't think that's exactly how Milky Feet are advertised, but if they were they would not be lying.  I slathered them in shea butter and wore socks to bed because they looked so bare and helpless.

Day 8 - I fine tuned the cuticles and dressed the toenails in some deep red glitter polish and, I swear, my feet look like something out of a catalogue.  Incredible.  I'm very pleased with the final result.

Day 9 - Day 16 - I took my fabulous feet with me on vacation and they looked perfect pretty much the whole time, although the soles are starting to thicken up again.

Day 17 - My feet are dry.  Dryer than normal.  

Day 18 - My feet are peeling from the dryness!  In the name of everything holy, NOOOOOOOOO!  I mean, they're not peeling the way they did after the Milky Feet exposure, but they are a lot dryer and rougher than usual and I haven't been treating them badly.  This sucks.

Day 19 - Back to the Ped Egg I think.  It's true that my feet were truly gorgeous for a couple of weeks there however a week of grossness is too much to pay for a mere two weeks of perfection, followed directly by another week of dry, cranky feet.

Conclusion - Milky Foot works, no doubt about it.  But it's vile.  Vile and inconvenient.  And the results don't last long enough to make the inconvenience worth my while.  Maybe if you're getting married barefoot or something...

The Great Milky Foot Experiment of 2013 [Dec 21]

My plan: Sexy feet for New Years.  My tool: Milky Foot!

Advertisements for this stuff are all over the television lately and, let's face it, my poor impulse control is second only to my love of vast swaths of peeling feet flesh.  It's like this product was made specifically for my demographic!

The idea is you steep your feet in this mild acidic solution and, 5 - 10 days later, after an unsightly (some would say disgusting) period of peeling, you have exfoliated feet the likes of which newborn infants would be jealous of.

Inside the box is a bag.  It's blue, and everybody knows blue = medical and trustworthy.  It also has smiling feet on it and that can't be bad, can it?  It says 3D for some reason and, as I'm fortunate to have 3D feet, I'm taking that as a good sign.

Inside the bag are (drumroll) two foot bags.  Bags for your feet.  They're roughly feet shaped and they are sealed.  If you squeeze them, and you bet your ass I did, you'll feel some kind of slimy, viscous liquid inside.  If you cut the tops off, which you'll have to do eventually, resist the urge to stick your nose in there and take a giant whiff. Smells bad, man. Smells real bad.

The instructions are simple and straight forward - put your clean feet in the foot bags and leave them there for an hour.  So I did.  It went like this;

0:00 - Super easy application. Cut tops off feet bags, insert feet, tighten tops of feet bags using supplied tab of sticky stuff, whack on a pair of socks, sit still for an hour. Job done.

0:10 - Feels cool, like menthol. Not unpleasant but slightly weird.

0:20 - Menthol tingling intensifies, but still not unpleasant or painful.

0:30 - You have to keep both feet flat on the floor and I want to cross my legs.  First world problems.

0:40 - Now I'm hungry.  I think the tingling is lessening, but I may be just getting used to it.

0:50 - No, it's definitely lessening.  Still hungry.

1:00 - Surfing the internet...

1:17 - Shit!  What time did I put these bags on?  Didn't I set a timer?!  Oh shit, the timer went off 17 minutes ago!  Am I bleeding?  Am I going to lose my feet?!  Shit!!

There was no blood or trauma, don't worry.  I took off the bags, rinsed my feet clean of the colourless gel that coated them, and inspected them for damage.  There was nothing. Nada.  No sign at all that they'd spent an hour and seventeen minutes trapped in a bag with acid.  

And that's where the anticlimactic tale ends.  For now.  Apparently I won't see any exfoliation magic for five to ten days so I guess the only thing I can do for now is to get something to eat and once again enjoy crossing my legs at will.

(Obvs I'll update with disgusting details when something happens)

Spectrum

It's an old colour but, boy, is it eye catching!

One coat of OPI Matte Nail Envy and two coats of OPI Ridge Filler for a smooth base, topped with three coats of Sally Hansen HD Spectrum, and finished with one coat of Revlon Quick Dry Topcoat.

And now I'm going to continue staring at my awesome nails.

506

After living with China Glaze Liquid Leather, a black creme, for a couple of unsatisfying hours I thought I'd play around with a special effect topcoat to see if that improved anything.

I've got a few Ozotic topcoats that I picked up on sale and have never tried.  They look gorgeous in the bottle and their website recommends to layer them over a dark base coat so it seemed like the perfect opportunity to try one of them.  I'm glad I did!  I loved the final look and wore it all week.

This is one coat of OPI Matte Nail Envy, two coats of China Glaze Liquid Leather, and one coat of Ozotic 506.  I didn't use a clear top coat over the top.

Liquid Leather

The nails are getting so long that I decided to square them off and go with a really dark colour.  And what could be darker than black?

This is one coat OPI Matte Nail Envy followed by two coats China Glaze Liquid Leather.  I found it uninspiring so I didn't waste any topcoat on it.

Khaleesi

I'll admit it.  I bought this polish because of the name.  Well, that, and how interesting it looked on the website.  It's a silvery white mesh with a gold shimmer, both in the bottle and on the suppliers website.

On the nail, however, it becomes a hideously streaky, bubbly mess with no visible gold shimmer but an extremely visible nail line.  It looks like one of those frosted nail polishes from the 80s.  I hated it.

This is one coat of OPI Matte Nail Envy, two coats of OPI Ridge Filler, two coats of Hello Darling Khaleesi, and one coat of Revlon Quick Dry Top Coat.

I wore it for 24 hours to see if it would grow on me because I really wanted to like it, but I just found it more objectionable every time I looked at my nails!  To hide the bubbling and add interest I threw on two coats of China Glaze Snow Globe and finished with a coat of Sally Hansen Insta-Dry Anti-Chip Top Coat.  Tacky as hell, but at least the bubbles and streaks are hidden!

Henley Regatta

I got this Butter London polish about 6 months ago but didn't want to waste such a glorious colour on my stumpy stumps.  But now that my nails are finally starting to gain some strength and length I decided to take it for a spin.  Totally the right decision!

The last time I used a Butter London glitter I loved it in the bottle but thought it was a little thin on the nail so, after the usual base coat of OPI Matte Nail Envy, I used two coats of a similar coloured cream MUD Paradise Valley to give it a bit of depth.  This is two coats of Butter London Henley Regatta, topped with two coats of Revlon Quick Dry Topcoat.

There is both blue and green micro glitter in this blue base and the shimmer is just gorgeous.  I adored this mani and its sexy eye-catching glitz.